07 November 2012

Let People In

Self-hatred has been lapping at my toes since I finished my step 4.  Fortunately steps 6 & 7 have kept it at bay, and given me hope for change.  I feel change, and it feels good.

But on bad days I feel overwhelmed by my inadequacies.  Or rather, my perceived inadequacies.  I finally acquired a copy of Courage to Change: One Day at a Time.  (You can get a very inexpensive used copy here.)

Here is the message for today, from Alateen:

"If no one knows us as we really are, we run the risk of becoming victims of our own self-hatred.  If we can be loved by somebody who sees us as we are, we can then begin to accept ourselves.  Others rarely think we're as bad as we do."

The people who know me as I really am, all that is wrong in my life, have been such a huge support for me when my confidence wavers and doubt and insecurities creep in. 

I hope you all have at least one person in your life who fulfills that role, and if possible a group of people.  And better yet, I hope that we are all doing our part to BE that person for someone else. 

I'm going on vacation with my family for a week to a place with palm trees. Love you all!


  1. This makes me think a lot about the way that I start to view my husband when anger and bitterness fill my heart. I wonder if he thinks I think he is horrible. I wonder if I think that. I think me forgiving my husband is between me and God, but one of the things it has done is helped me to start seeing my husband the way God sees him. If anyone should be loved despite all of their weaknesses, it should be the spouse. I don't think that means accepting bad behavior or enabling, but having charity. Hmmmm...

  2. Thanks Jane! I really needed this today. Lot's of self hatred having not completed step 4, yet:( I know...I know I need to get in it, but I haven't had time to myself. So many interruptions this week.

    Your post gave me more motivation...tomorrow is the day!

    Hope you have a great vacation...sounds warm:)

  3. Love you, Jane! Have a great vacay! (Excuse me while I go repent for my envy....)

  4. What an awesome post! Especially love the quote from the book. Hope your vacay is awesome!! xoxo

  5. I love you and all your flaws. :)

  6. self-hatred? I can't imagine how could you feel this way when i know how fabulous you are.

  7. you are fabulous and I dont even know you. Let go of the negativity :hug:

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